In the July 2002 issue of Child Care Information Exchange, Renatta
Cooper contributed a thoughtful article on how parents and caregivers need to
work together even when they do not share the same views on some child rearing
issues. For example, she noted that if most parents in the US were asked to list
the traits they hope their children will exhibit, "independence would be
in the top ten." However, for families who are recent immigrants, they may
not place as much importance on independence. Renatta shared an example from her
experience:
"Caregivers, particularly in group settings, encourage independent, self-care
behavior among children. Parents may not follow through with this independent
behavior at home, because of the time it takes, or because they prefer to think
of their children as young and dependent. I can remember a three year old name
Zack who was in the child care program at Pacific Oaks. His mother worked close
by and would join him for lunch at least once a week. When she joined him, Zack
would sit at the table while his mother took his lunch box out of his cubby, opened
his lunch items, and prompted him to eat. He did these things on his own, like
all the other children, when his mother was absent. His mother, Bea, was honest
about her behavior, 'He's my baby; I don't want to see him so grown up yet.'"
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