"When you want to change someone's mood, mind, or willingness to act, ask yourself not 'How can I win this argument?' but 'How can I win agreement without anger?' advises Jay Heinrichs in his book, Thank You for Arguing: What Aristotle, Lincoln, and Homer Simpson Can Teach Us About the Art of Persuasion (New York: Three Rivers Press, 2007).
"Never debate the undebatable. Instead, focus on goals. Control the mood with volume, tone, stories. Watch for persuadable moments. And, most important, to gain agreement, be agreeable �" express similarities and shared values; show people that you have their best interests, as well as your own, at heart."
Comments (2)
Displaying All 2 CommentsUnited States
The correct title to the book in your article is actually "Thank you for Arguing" rather than "Thank you for not arguing".
Daycare In Demand
Portsmouth, NH, United States
This is so true--reminds me of the Dale Carnegie classic quote that "The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it."
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