Good Leaders Get Emotional Sometimes

"We hide emotions to stay in control, look strong, and keep things at arm's length," observed Doug Sundheim, in his article "Good Leaders Get Emotional," in Harvard Business Review (August 15, 2013). "But in reality, doing so diminishes our control and weakens our capacity to lead because it hamstrings us. We end up not saying what we mean or meaning what we say. We beat around the bush. And that never connects, compels or communicates powerfully.

Yes, being too emotional in business can create problems. It clouds objective analysis, screws up negotiations, and leads to rash decisions. But in nearly two decades of working with leaders, I've found that showing too much emotion is far less of a problem than the opposite - showing too little.

Emotions are critical to everything a leader must do: build trust, strengthen relationships, set a vision, focus energy, get people moving, make trade-offs or tough decisions, and learn from failure."

Nancy Rosenow, in Leading Early Childhood Organizations, writes: "For many years, leaders were taught never to appear too emotional. In the past, administrators were often judged as too weak if they ever discussed concepts as ‘squishy’ as leading in a heart-centered way. Recently, though, this misunderstanding has been turned on its head, as more and more has been written about the need to enlist both head and heart in service to effective leadership."

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