Helping Children Recognize Limits

In Big Body Play:  Why Boisterous, Vigorous, and Very Physical Play is Essential to Children's Development and Learning, Frances Carlson offers this advice on encouraging children to tune in to sensations and recognize limits during active play...

"Children, including infants, benefit from having all kinds of big body experiences, even mildly uncomfortable ones.  Naturally, adults must not allow children to be harmed.  But rather than trying to halt all uncomfortable physical play, adults should consider how they can use an experience to enhance children's learning in safe ways, even in infancy.

"Too often when infants have an uncomfortable physical interaction  - especially if cries result - parents or caregivers stop the play.  A more helpful response for encouraging empathy through body play is one that brings the infant's attention to the sensations experienced....

"With older children as well, teacher can support awareness by coaching children during big body play.  A larger child wrestling with a smaller child may not realize his greater size and strength may affect how long the other child is willing to continue to play.  When the smaller child pushes against the chest of the larger boy, indicating that he wants to get up, the larger child may press down even harder.  Simply banning play at this point would deny these children the opportunity to learn how to hold themselves back...

"Monitor a child's facial expressions and body language to detect any discomfort in play situations, and then communicate to the other children what you see transpiring."

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