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02/28/2012

10 Skills of Competent Parents

To the person who does not know where he wants to go there is no favorable wind.
Seneca

There are 10 competencies that predict good parenting outcomes, asserts researcher Robert Epstein in Scientific American Mind (November 2010).  These 10, listed in order from most to least important, predict a strong parent-child bond and children's happiness, health, and success:

  1. Love and affection.
    "You support and accept the child, are physically affectionate, and spend quality one-on-one time together."

  2. Stress management.
    "You take steps to reduce stress for yourself and your child, practice relaxation techniques, and promote positive interpretations of events."

  3. Relationship skills.
    "You maintain a healthy relationship with your spouse, significant other, or co-parent and model effective relationship skills with others."

  4. Autonomy and independence.
    "You treat your child with respect and encourage him or her to become self-sufficient and self-reliant."

  5. Education and learning.
    "You promote and model learning and provide educational opportunities for your child."

  6. Life skills.
    "You provide for your child, have a steady income, and plan for the future."

  7. Behavior management.
    "You make extensive use of positive reinforcement and punish only when other methods of managing behavior have failed."

  8. Health.
    "You model a healthy lifestyle and good habits, such as regular exercise and proper nutrition."

  9. Religion.
    "You support spiritual or religious development and participate in spiritual or religious activities."

  10. Safety.
    "You take precautions to protect your child and maintain awareness of the child's activities and friends."



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