Are You Really Listening?

03/17/2011

Like music and art, love of nature is a common language that can transcend political or social boundaries.
Jimmy Carter, former US president

"Listening is a strategy and a skill that is losing ground in society," observes Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves in Emotional Intelligence 2.0 (San Diego: Talent Smart, 2009). Here is their advice...

"Listening isn't just about hearing words, it's also about listening to the tone, speed, and volume of the voice. What is being said? Anything not being said? What hidden messages exist below the surface?

"...Here's a strategy to practice when someone is talking to you: stop everything else and listen fully until the other person is finished speaking. When you are on a phone call, don't type an email. When your son asks you a question, put your laptop down and look at him while you respond. When you are eating dinner with your family, turn off the TV and listen to the conversation around the table. When you're meeting with someone, close the door and sit near the person so you can focus and listen. Simple things like these will help you stay in the present moment, pick up on the cues the other person sends, and really hear what he or she is saying."

[Editor's comment: And, when you are meeting with someone in person, DO NOT be continually checking for and responding to text messages and email on your cell.]

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