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Transforming Your Computer From Paperweight to Management Tool

by Chip Donohue
July/August 2001
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Article Link: http://exchangepress.com/article/transforming-your-computer-from-paperweight-to-management-tool/5014080/

"A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five." - Groucho Marx

Take a moment to reflect on the words that come to mind when you think about working on a computer. That's long enough! Now, let me ask you six simple questions.

Are the words that come to mind ones you prefer not to speak in polite company?
n YES
n NO
n DEFINE POLITE

Has your computer become a paperweight on your desk (an office version of the clothes rack your exercise bike at home has become)?
n YES
n NO
n SO WHAT, IT DOES THE JOB (I haven't seen my exercise bike in years)!

Does your home VCR have a flashing time/date light?
n YES
n NO
n SO WHAT, IT CAME THAT WAY

Can you tell the difference between your computer mouse and the cute little pet in the preschool room?
n YES
n NO
n ASK MY CAT

Have you ever said, "Today I'm going to learn how to use this #*$&! thing once and for all?"
n YES
n NO
n NONE OF YOUR #*$&! BUSINESS

Have you ever asked a child of five to show you how to do something on the computer?
n YES
n NO
n I REFUSE TO ANSWER ON THE
GROUNDS THAT IT MAY
INCRIMINATE ME

If you said "yes" to one or more of the questions above, ...

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